URGENT !!PLEASE HELP ME...two short questions, i am really desperate:( BF probably cheating?

Ok guyz. together with my bf for 3 1/2 years. for two months now we have a distance relationship (he lives ca. 80 miles away) .





I think hes cheating. And heres why:





1) as is stopped by last time (unplanned) he had an open box of condoms. when i know it shouldnt be opened.





2) He was shaved down there (which he usually did to make me go down on him) and he didnt know i was stopping by.





3) a condom is missing from the box.





Its pretty obvious i guess. But i didnt tell him anything. That was a month ago, and I kept on acting normal. I didnt want to appear paranoid or so...cuz when i sniff around he always gets mad. And counting condoms is kinda sniffing.I know if I ask he will deny. Cant ask his friends cuz i dont know them. I have no real evidence he did.





TWO QUESTIONS:





a) How do I confront him? What EXACTLY do i say?? Im not good at this, he always wins when we have a fight.





b) How do I get rid of feeling so unnatractive after he cheated (or so i think). A lot of guys hit on me, and I know i look good...but still I feel so akward and ugly, and not as attractive as the girls he wants..





Damn I know I sound like a stupid naive bimbo, and Im not. I might be ready to forgive him, **** happens, but I dont know how to approach the situation:(URGENT !!PLEASE HELP ME...two short questions, i am really desperate:( BF probably cheating?
ok you asks a Q ok but why did you because your asking is my boyfriend cheating of course he is but any way you don't no that yet but your ready to for give him how do you no he isn't gonna dump you that's what i would be worried about and tell him what you no tell him some 1 told you that he was seen with another women and see what he has to say about thatURGENT !!PLEASE HELP ME...two short questions, i am really desperate:( BF probably cheating?
GUT INSTINCT IS ALWAYS RIGHT my dear!!! ALWAYS! He always wins arguments because you don't have self confidence, all the way down to feeling ugly and unattractive when guys hit on you. You are feeling insecure because your boyfriend doesn't do things that make you FEEL SECURE. I would break up, I KNOW that's easier said than done. But I am 26 and have had my fair share of heartbreaks (going through one right now) and can tell you the heart has this amazing ability of healing over time. But you are just gonna feel worse and worse the longer you are with him and it is gonna be harder and harder to leave. Bless you sweety good luck
I wouldnt bother confronting him if I was you he isnt going to admit to it. Its very rare that a guy does. I would either 1. 'sniff' around some more or 2. just take that as enough evidence and leave.. Id go with 2 if I was you
If you want to know for sure this is what you do:


wait until you two are having a normal conversation about something totally mundane, and right in the middle of the conversation look him straight in the face and ask him if he's cheated on you. You will catch him off guard and he will not have any time to make up a lie, his face will give away everything. If he gets a goofy grin on his face or tries to stall then he's probably guilty and if he is, it's up to you if you want to break up or not. I cheated on a bf once and he immediately broke up with me, I was so devastated I vowed never ever to cheat on anyone ever again and I never have. I believe people can change. And don't feel unattractive! Guys just do these things sometime, it is not a reflection on you. Plus, pretty is so subjective, there are tons of guys out there who will think you are hot.
WOWW girl! seriously? you are going to have a total and utter break down over this? He prob shaved because he wanted to, the condom was missing i bet because he gave it to a friend or put it in a wallet of something and I really cant believe that you are making such a big deal over NOTHING! Get over it or you can keep pestering about it and push him away. Who wants to be with a controlling physco? so yeah... STOP!
I feel for you, hun. This is a difficult situation and I've been there.





It's possible these signs are nothing.


*open box of condoms, gave one to a friend?


*stays shaved because it makes his junk look bigger.


*gets upset when you ';sniff around'; because he's offended that you don't trust him after 3 1/2 years.





But if your gut is telling you something is wrong... Trust your instincts.





Talk to him. Avoid planning an elaborate speech, just short and simple. And try to avoid making accusations.





I can't tell you EXACTLY what to say. That's up to you. You could start by telling him you can't shake the feeling that something's wrong and ask him if there's anything he wants to tell you. I can't guarantee he'll open up and confess if he has been messing around, or that it won't turn into a huge fight. The point is to just get it out in the open.





Your appearance may have nothing to do with a guy cheating on you. My lil brother cheated on his smoking hot girlfriend a few years back. Why? Because he was a jerk and needed to grow up. You said it yourself ';I know I look good.'; Own it. Work with your best assets: great smile, pretty eyes, killer curves. Whatever you have, accentuate.





Confidence is sexy.


http://www.ivillage.co.uk/relationships/鈥?/a>





Hope this helps and good luck.
Agree with Desi 110%. Girl do you not have any respect for yourself? Yes ';sh!t happens.'; You forget to study for a test, you get a parking ticket. ';Sh!t happens.';





Cheating does not fall under the ';Sh!t happens'; category. That falls under the ';My Boyfriend is a Complete As$hole But I am too Naive to See It.';





You need to get more confidence in yourself. If you know you look good then stop acting like a doormat he can walk on. Stand up for yourself. Who cares how you approach it. He's been your man for 3.5 years, I'm sure you feel comfortable enough to open your mouth and be like, ';damn why is there an open box of condoms, why is one missing, and why are you shaven down there.'; I would not beat around this bush any longer.





I wouldn't be forgiving him either. That's inexcusable, unforgivable, and he has zero respect for you.
Honestly, it doesnt matter if hes cheating or not...





If you're already ready to forgive him when u dont even know the answer....why even find out. Live in your perfect little world. Im sorry, but sh** happens??!!??!! You are proving your ';i know i sound like a stupid naive bimbo, and im not'; wrong.





Wow...
Maybe he gave the condom to a friend who was in desperate need of 1? You really must learn to trust, otherwise you end up alone. Good luck