After all the fussing, fighting and cheating, I think I pushed my husband away for good. What can I do?

I've been with my husband Tyrone for 18 years and we've been legally married for 11 years. We're the same age and we been together since tenth grade. We were virgins and we gave our virginity to each other and everything. We have two sons and two daughters; ages 12, 10, 7 and 5. Now we're 33 but the past 8 or 9 years of our marriage have been real rocky. Tyrone was not the traditional husband. He and I shared cleaning chores, took turns cooking dinner and washing laundry and stuff like that. He's been unemployed for the past 10 months though but I still have a good job. Even though he was still a great help around the house, I would always argue with Tyrone about not having a job(although he's been trying). I made him feel low by calling him ';pathetic'; and ';sorry'; and reminding him that he'll never be sh*t without me. I was so wrong for that. But Tyrone is not innocent either, he has cheated on me many times throughout our marriage and instead of leaving him, I always resorted to the violence. I would slap him, punch him and hit him with any household object within my reach but he controlled himself. But two nights ago, things got bad. Even though it's been over a year that Tyrone cheated on me, I still felt that I had the right to do the same. So, I slept with my coworker's brother a few times. Tyrone was mad when he found out but he told me not to do it again. I called him a hypocrite and just to make him upset, I bragged about how good the sex was with the other guy. Tyrone got really mad and then he started packing his stuff and leaving while I cursed him out and pounded on him. Then my 12-year old daughter grabbed me to pull me away from her father and as a reflex, I slapped her. Tyrone got FURIOUS and then he actually slapped me for the first time. Then he took the kids and they went to his mother's house for the weekend. Tyrone emailed me and told me that after he brings the kids back, he don't think he'll be returning. I think he's serious this time and I feel so bad. I love him and I'm sorry I didn't appreciate him more. I think I might have pushed him away for good. Is there anything I can do or say to make this work? I'm crying my eyes out and I can't even pray about it.After all the fussing, fighting and cheating, I think I pushed my husband away for good. What can I do?
A man needs to feel needed and appreciated. His ego has already taken a blow because without employment he cannot provide for you or the children. He is at a vulnerable state right now and your behavior has only made him feel worse. You need to get counseling for your tyrants. There may be hope since you guys have so much history together, but he may not trust you the same. You are the one person who is supposed to have his back no matter what and you are the main one kicking him while he's down.


Sounds like you may be stressed too from the added financial responsibility. Please seek counseling to find the source of your stress because your kids do not deserve to be exposed to constant fighting and being slapped by anyone, not even you.After all the fussing, fighting and cheating, I think I pushed my husband away for good. What can I do?
you have to let go...you're relationship with him is unhealthy and even though you love him alot...you must let go in order to lead a better life GOODLUCK!
Your lucky he stayed as long as he did. You, are quite frankly, a stupid spoiled *****. I hope Tyrone gets a fantastic jobs, hooks up with a bunch of models then gets married to a smokin hot woman. As for what you did to your daughter.......feel shame.....the years ahead will be bumpy.





And, it wasn't wrong of him to hit you seeing as you put your hands on his seed. I hope he slapped the taste right out of your mouth and you don't get it back for years.
It's really up to him whether he should take you back or not. Even if you did support him when he was jobless you put him down to add to it.... Men dont like to feel emasculated. You also cheated on him...Two wrongs never makes a right. And if you didn't truly forgive him the first time he cheated on you, you should have left then...and i suggest you take some anger management classes or something, or just go to counseling together...
Doesn't sound like it's meant to be...you know when one door closes another door opens...look ahead to the next open door.
The worst part of this whole scenario is that someone did not call child protective services on you. How DARE you slap an innocent child because you cannot contain your own rage? It is bad enough that those poor children have to witness this mess of a marriage on a daily basis. I am CERTAIN they are emotionally scarred from it. There chances of growing up and having healthy relationships are slim due to the selfish two of you. If you two components of a time bomb intend to get back together again, get into counseling both together and apart....and get into anger management. I know you and your husband think it is all about each of you and what you want....but there are kids involved here who did not ask to be born into such a disaster of a family. Get a damn grip on yourself. Dry up those ridiculous tears of yours (you get no pity here)........go tend to those children who probably have been crying on the inside for years!
I don't know how to fix a mess like that, I've never had that sort of life. But perhaps what I do with other aspects of life or business when they get out of control will help. What I do is I start cleaning up and getting rid of crap and doing the little things on my to do list, just to reduce both the mental and physical clutter so that I can see more clearly what I need to do to fix things.





So clean up the rest of your life and then maybe this will come into better view.